To Understand
by Shyma Tavrott Lupin
Summary: I run into the fresher, my full attention to the mirror. But the face staring back at me isn't that of my own it's that of....no it can't be....I killed him.......but it is....it's the face of 14 year old Obi-Wan Kenobi. Non-Slash. COMPLETE!
1. Tired

Stars I hate him.

I hate him so much.

_So tired….._

I glare at him. A dirty smirk on my face.

I glare at Obi-Wan Kenobi. The monster that betrayed me. Turned my own wife against me. And then forced me into a fight. That damned traitor.

He stares back at me with a very pathetic expression and screams "It's over Anakin! I have the high ground!"

My smirk deepens. Who does he think he is? Telling me it's over?

He obviously doesn't know how powerful I really am. So you know what? I'll show him.

Without a word I jump off the blasted droid I'm standing on and somersault behind him. Perfect.

Now I don't want to be a completely unfair and horrible opponent so I give him the chance to spin around and face me before impaling my saber deep into his stomach.

His eyes widen and his mouth hangs slightly open. Oh yes Obi-Wan. I just completely killed your theory that there "is some good left in me"

Wonder where he got such a stupid idea.

My mouth splits into a grin at the thought.

"A-Anakin…." He whispers. My grin dies into a sneer at the sound of that name. That's not my name anymore. As a matter of fact that name is a disgusting reminder of the pathetic fool I once was.

"The name's Vader" I growl before tearing the saber out of his stomach. Seeing his eyes widen further and hearing him make that choking noise calms me down a bit. For it makes me feel powerful.

It makes me feel superior to him.

And then suddenly when I think things can't get any more pleasurable, he falls. He falls to his knees, and then slowly falls backward, heading straight for the lava river behind him

And as his limp body rolls down the steep incline of gravel something in the back of my head screams at me.

_Just so tired…….just sithin help him and ask him why. Just ask him why and everything's gonna be alright. Ask him why he's doing all this and then it'll all be over. It'll all be over and you can rest……._

The voice in my head says those words full of emotion and hope. And for a second all that emotion and hope get to me but I kick them out.

No. All that matters now is to get rid of everything and anything that would stop me from saving Padme. And right about now that would be Obi-Wan. And I need to get rid of him.

I turn my attention back to the falling body in front of me. And much to my surprise, suddenly, just before he can fall into the lava, he turns himself onto his stomach, reaching out and grabbing a handful of gravel with his right hand. It keeps him just inches away from the lava

I frown. Just great he's still alive. I draw my saber and take a step down. Slowly, cause the last thing I want to do at a time like this is slip on the gravel and fall into the lava myself.

I sigh, this one just won't die without me stabbing him to death will he?

"Anakin!" he calls up, his voice thick with emotion "Anakin….please"

Suddenly something inside me goes off. Maybe it's was that I was about to kill the only father I ever knew. Maybe it was that I was about to do something that I knew would haunt me for the rest of my life. And maybe…..just maybe it was that I knew Obi-Wan Kenobi never begged for his life. Yes I knew that Obi-Wan wasn't asking me to save, or even help him. He was asking me to do the right thing and not kill him. Because if I kill him, we both know it will be the last thing I do as a Jedi. Yes killing him will make me a full fledged dark side user. A Sith.

But that's precisely what I want to do right?

_Is it? Is it really?_

Stars, it's that stupid voice in my head again. If that thing keeps coming back I'll never kill Kenobi in time. So I shut it up. And then another voice comes and stops me from taking another step down:

"Anakin, please…" Obi-Wan.

Force, if it's not one thing it's the other.

He tries to pull himself up and away from the heat of the river that's just inches below him. He ends up only an inch higher than where he was.

"Anakin, please don't do this, I understand what you're going through, but please…" he screams, tears actually leaking out of his eyes. Tears.

Actual, physical tears. The great General Kenobi, in tears.

Force, I haven't seen Obi-Wan cry since way back on Naboo when Qui-Gon died. When he was forced to take me as a padawan.

When he-

Right then, all the sympathy that had come into me drains out as all the memories from Qui-Gon's death on come rushing back to me.

"No! You don't understand. You never understood me!" I suddenly scream out at him. Overwhelmed by all the memories and horrors that are running through my head.

And then…the next sentence he screams just…..it just gets to me somehow……he screams "How could I understand you if you never understood me?!"

The words make me feel…..strange. Like everything I've ever done and known is wrong. All wrong.

I take a couple of steps back. Until I'm on flat ground........

And then….and then I surrender. I toss my lightsaber aside and give into my exhaustion.

Allowing myself to let go of all my worldly cares and desires. Allowing myself to collapse onto that coarse Mustafarian gravel.

**Wow that actually came out pretty nice. **


	2. Sith Hells

_Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep_

What the hell is that damned beeping?

_Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep_

Force, please just let me sleep. The thick fog of sleep that clouds my senses feels so good. I just want it to last.

I just want to sleep.

_Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep_

Please, please, please just let me rest

_Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep Bee-_

……it stopped. The damned beeping stopped. Thank the force….now I can-

"Wake up Obi-Wan"

……….that voice……I haven't heard that voice in almost 2 decades……

I immediately jump up and register a number of things:

1) I was lying in a very comfortable bed that felt very much like my own….

2) This looks like my room before Obi-Wan moved into Qui-Gon's room (right after he took me as an apprentice. I remember him telling Mace that there was no way he was gonna let me stay in Qui-Gon's room so he moved in himself)

3) And stars end, Qui-Gon Jinn is standing beside my bed.

Sith hells, Qui-Gon is standing next to me. Sithspit.

But before I can jump on him and scream "SHAVITQUI-GONYOU'REALIVEIMISSEDYOUSOMUCHANDYOU'LLNEVERBELEIVEWHAT'SHAPPENEDSINCEYOU'VEBEENGONE!!!!  
Something hits me.

Did he just say wake up _Obi-Wan_? Force just hearing that name makes my blood boil.

But why the hell would he call me Obi-Wan? I turn my head and look a him with a very confused expression when something catches my eye.

The ginger braid sitting on my shoulder…….wait what?! I don't have ginger hair! There's only one person I even know with ginger hair and that's-

No. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. No.

I jump out of bed and fly past Qui-Gon (I manage to catch a glimpse of his hand on the snooze button of Obi-Wan's old alarm clock. And that solves the mystery of the damned beeping….)

For a moment it slips me where the fresher in my own room is. I mean it's been so long since I've even been in my own room.

But after a second of wracking my brains I find it and run in. As soon as I run in I slam the door shut, lock it and turn my attention to one thing. The mirror.

Then much to my horror when I look at the mirror, staring back at me is short cropped ginger hair, greenish blue eyes, a shoulder long padawan braid and a much younger face than I remember last seeing those features on.

I see the face of 14 year old Obi-Wan Kenobi.

**You guys will never believe that i actually dreamt this up. I actually dreamt up the whole story and then when i woke up i typed the first few chapters as fast as possible XD**

**But the thing that really made me write it is that in all the time travel fics i've read it's Obi-Wan that goes back in time into Anakin's body. And then Obi-Wan sees things through Anakin's eyes and all. But i've never really seen one where Anakin sees things through Obi-Wan's eyes and it sounds really cool. And i hope you guys see it the same way.**


	3. Killed Them

I Anakin Skywalker have officially gone mad.

Mad in many ways. For starters I am somehow seeing myself in the body of the horrible and disgusting Obi-Wan Kenobi.

Dammit I don't even understand how this could have happened!

I mean I'm pretty sure I just passed out on Mustafar. I don't think this is the force because I doubt I died. I wasn't so exhausted that it could kill me. So how the hell did this happen?

How the hell did I end up in Obi-Wan's body? How the hell did I end up to a time when I wasn't even born!

Everything about this is insane and crazy and horrible...................................................well not all of it.

I am overjoyed to see Qui-Gon alive and well. But he isn't as I remember him. He seems so bitter…..so cold.

I mean it's like he's trying to keep me at arms length. He hasn't even noticed that I've locked myself up in the fresher for the past half an hour. He certainly didn't treat me like that while we where on Tatoine.

Back then all he did was care about my well-being and all but now…….

And then something hits me. Qui-Gon cared for me back on Tatoine because back then he was looking at the face of Anakin Skywalker, and now he's looking at the face of Obi-Wan….

Funny I would have never thought Obi-Wan's relationship with his beloved father figure was so rough.

"Obi-Wan, get out of the fresher immediately!" A roar comes from someplace outside. And with all honestly it's so loud and yet calm at the same time, it scares me.

……Funny….I'm a grown 23 year old man and it scares the shit out of me……wonder what affect it had on 14 year old Obi-Wan.

That's my last thought before I let myself out of the fresher and walk into the kitchen where Qui-Gon is sitting at the table.

"Yes master?" I whisper quietly, my head down.

"How many times have I talked to you about punctuality Obi-Wan? Do you realize that you're 5 minutes from missing your first class?" He almost shouts. Well it's a calm but loud shout. And I can almost feel him staring a hole through me "Did you know your alarm clock was ringing for 20 minutes before I decided to come in and turn it off myself? Have I not told you hundreds of times that you wake up precisely at 5:30, meditate and then go to attend your classes? Now you won't even have the time for that!" He gives an irritated groan "Hurry up, eat and go to class. Meet me at the training ward afterwards for a spar" he finishes finally.

It makes me feel so small. So weak. So small. So unloved..........  
I never knew Qui-Gon even had the ability to speak that way. He just directly accused and yelled at me for not waking up at an unholy hour of 5:30. That's crazy!

Obi-Wan let me sleep till 9 or 10 before I had to meditate or go to classes. And he never yelled at me for anything I did…..he just sort of subtly made me feel guilty……..

"Obi-Wan Kenobi have you been listening to a word I said?" I sharp growl snaps me out of my thoughts. I jerk my head up to look at him and see his jaw ripple slightly.

And just as I'm about to open my mouth to speak he cuts me off "Eat and go to your first class."

"'m not hungry master" I say quietly, still looking down.

"Fine then get along to your class. And don't forget about sparring afterwards" He says, his voice softening up the slightest bit.

"Yes master" I mutter and walk out of the kitchen.

Ok…..classes…classes…classes…..hm….what classes did 14 year old Obi-Wan have? I obviously have no idea so I just walk out the door, clueless as to where I was headed.

But heading out into the hall was probably a far worse than listening to Qui-Gon yell. Because first I saw when I walked into the hall was about 30 people I remember killing.

30 people that met their end through my lightsaber back when I invaded the temple.

The sight of those people walking by, laughing and enjoying their lives makes me nauseous. I lean on a nearby wall for a moment before beginning to walk again.

Still clueless as to where I was going. Sure I knew my way around the temple but I still have no idea what classes Obi-Wan attended so….

I eventually find myself walking past doors of classrooms, peering into some of them, seeing some people that I know….or more like knew.

By now everyone's out of the hallway and in their class. So I just wandered the empty halls.

And just as I'm about to walk past the last door of the floor, I hear voices inside that make me stop:

"Nah Jinn ain't like that. He wouldn't just take Kenobi cause he feels bad for the kid"

What? Qui-Gon took Obi-Wan cause felt bad for him? What????

I quietly crouch in front of the door and press my ear against it, trying to make out what the people inside where saying.

"Of course he took Kenobi cause he felt bad for him. Don't you see the way he treats the kid? Like he doesn't even want him." I hear a second voice say.

"Kid deserves better than to be the recovery tool for some arrogant traitor that Jinn used to call a padawan" the first voice says.

"Yeah….poor kid. He's taking the heat for Xanatos's turning. Damn Jinn should've never taken that guy as a padawan. He was screwy and we all knew it from that start"

"But you know Jinn. Always does things his way no matter what. He wants to love and care for a traitor like that he will. He wants to mess up some innocent kid like Obi-Wan, he will"

"Jinn doesn't deserve a prize like Kenobi. I swear if I hadn't been knighted a couple of weeks ago I would have taken the kid. He's good and everyone knows it. He's talented and special but somehow Jinn knows how to make all that an excuse on how the kid's got darkness in him."

"Xanatos has driven that man mad. But that's no reason he should pull all that shit on Obi-Wan"

"It's sad really. Do you have the kid in any of your classes?"

"Nah, wish I did though. I could use someone good like him"

"You should see Obi-Wan. He looks so lost now. I mean he still gets perfect grades and all but he just looks so empty. He barely ever talks in class and during free periods he exchanges at the most like 5 words with his friends. It's a sad thing"

"But what's worse is how Jinn reacted to the whole Melida/Daan issue and-"

But before I can hear anymore, I feel a tap on my shoulder. It makes me literally jump a couple of inches in the air. I immediately spin around and see that hovering over me is a very much younger form of…….Bant.

My heart skips several beats for the first thing that runs through my head is:

_Holy shit I killed her_

"Obi, what are you doing here?" she says sticking out a hand in my direction. I nervously take it and allow her to help me stand. The same thing running through my head over and over…..

_Holy shit I killed her. I killed her when she begged me to spare her. When she was one of the people I trusted the most at the temple. When she asked my why I was doing this I cut her head clean off. Holy shit I killed her._

"N-nothing" I manage to mutter "W-what are you doing here?"

"Going to the fresher" she says holding up her hall pass in front of my face.

"Erm….me too…I just got a bit distracted is all…." I manage to get out. Force why is it so nerve wracking talking to dead people?

_Maybe cause it was you that killed them…._

Damn that voice in my head……

"Oh, ok then, I gotta get running, see you later Obi-Wan" she smiles then walks past me.

As soon as she turns the corner, I let out a breath of relief. Force that was terrifying.

I can't believe I actually killed her. What had she ever done to me except treat all my wounds and sweet talk Obi-Wan into taking things easy on me?

Is that why I killed her? Because she made life easier for me?

The thought makes me sick. It makes me absolutely sick that I would kill someone that's make my life all the better. Like Padme and-……Force…..I killed Padme.

I choked my own wife to death in my fit of rage. Shit.

Ikilledtheonlywomanthatieverloveddammitshejustcametotellmethatshewantedmetocomebackwithherbutinsteadofdoingwhatshewantedigotmadandchokedhertodeath………….andnowmychildrenaregonetoo…

That string of thoughts runs through my head over and over…

And it makes me sick. So sick that I suddenly start to run through the halls to the nearest fresher. My heart pounding faster with each step I take.

And as soon as I barge into the fresher, I lean over to the nearest sink and throw up.

Ikilledtheonlywomanthatieverloveddammitshejustcametotellmethatshewantedmetocomebackwithherbutinsteadofdoingwhatshewantedigotmadnadchokedhertodeathandnowmychildrenaregonetoomybabiesaredeadbecauseofme…….

After what seems like forever I run out of contents to empty my body of, and quickly manage to rinse my mouth before sinking slowly to the ground, leaning on the nearest wall.

Then suddenly the thought of Padme leaves my head as the conversation I overheard earlier comes back to me:

"_Nah Jinn ain't like that. He wouldn't just take Kenobi cause he feels bad for the kid" _

"_Of course he took Kenobi cause he felt bad for him. Don't you see the way he treats the kid? Like he doesn't even want him."_

"_Kid deserves better than to be the recovery tool for some arrogant traitor that Jinn used to call a padawan"_

"Yeah_….poor kid. He's taking the heat for Xanatos's turning. Damn Jinn should've never taken that guy as a padawan. He was screwy and we all knew it from that start" _

"_But you know Jinn. Always does things his way no matter what. He wants to love and care for a traitor like that he will. He wants to mess up some innocent kid like Obi-Wan, he will"_

"_Jinn doesn't deserve a prize like Kenobi. I swear if I hadn't been knighted a couple of weeks ago I would have taken the kid. He's good and everyone knows it. He's talented and special but somehow Jinn knows how to make all that an excuse on how the kid's got darkness in him."_

"_Xanatos has driven that man mad. But that's no reason he should pull all that shit on Obi-Wan" _

"_It's sad really. Do you have the kid in any of your classes?"_

"_Nah, wish I did though. I could use someone good like him"_

"_You should see Obi-Wan. He looks so lost now. I mean he still gets perfect grades and all but he just looks so empty. He barely ever talks in class and during free periods he exchanges at the most like 5 words with his friends. It's a sad thing" _

"_But what's worse is how Jinn reacted to the whole Melida/Daan issue and-_

And what?

But that's not really important. What strikes me is that they where talking about someone named Xanatos. They said Qui-Gon used to call him a padawan……and they called him a traitor……which could only mean……Xanatos turned to the dark side.

Wow. Qui-Gon's padawan turned to the dark side? That's crazy.

Then something else hits me. Those guys said Qui-Gon took Obi-Wan cause he felt bad for him? That's even more crazy! Why would Qui-Gon do such a thing?

"_Of course he took Kenobi cause he felt bad for him. Don't you see the way he treats the kid? Like he doesn't even want him."_

That's intense.

That's injustice.

It's not fair.

It's not right. Why would you take a padawan and mistreat him? Why would you do such a thing? Why would Qui-Gon do such a thing?

And about Obi-Wan being some recovery tool for Xanatos? Where they trying to say that Qui-Gon was acting so cold and arrogant because he was trying to block out anything that could possibly cause the turning of another padawan? Is that why he was being so insanely strict on Obi-Wan?

………………….you think Obi-Wan will become like that because of my turning?

**awww i love that last part. Anakin is really starting to get some serious stuff knocked into that empty head of his. **

**It hurts me so much to write so badly about Xanatos T-T i love that guy. and all of u that r my If Everone Cared and Someday followers know that very well ^-^**

**well hope u liked the chapter, its a bit emotional but thats how we all like it rite? lol review!!**


	4. How Could He?

After spending hours in the fresher attempting to contemplate what I had just heard and what I had recently done I remember that Qui-Gon had told me to meet him at the training ward for sparring.

Even though I don't know what classes Obi-Wan had, I still vaguely remember what time the classes end…….....................which was a half an hour ago………..great. Qui-Gon's gonna kill me.

Wait no, what am I talking about Qui-Gon wouldn't kill me. Obi-Wan would. Obi-Wan was the one that was a stick in the mud about being late. Not Qui-Gon.

I don't realize how horribly wrong I am until I reach the training ward.

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"How many times am I going to have to tell you before you finally listen to me Obi-Wan. How many times? How many times are you going to be late? How many times re you going to apologize and think of some petty excuse for why you're late? What could have possibly been more important than what I had to tell you Obi-Wan?!" Qui-Gon is very loud.

His voice actually intimidates me…….

Come to think of it Obi-Wan never yelled at me for being late. He always just warned me. Maybe that was his mistake. Maybe because he only warned me I took advantage of it and made things more important than him. Because I knew the punishment wouldn't be anymore severe than a warning and at the most 2 hours of meditation…….

"So what do you think would be an appropriate punishment Obi-Wan?" Qui-Gon growls staring at me. I of course am looking as far down and as far away from him as I possibly can.

I'm really getting tired of him saying Obi-Wan with every sentence. That sort of makes it clear that he's blaming and screaming at me. Unlike when Obi-Wan warned me he always used to say Padawan. Which made me feel slightly better because by saying padawan he could be addressing anyone while warning. Not me. Because Obi-Wan never got mad at me. Or so I'd like to think.

Because for some reason the very thought of my master being mad at me made me want to crawl into a hole and die.

…………….is that how Obi-Wan felt when Qui-Gon was yelling at him?

"3 Hours of meditation, master…" I whisper in a response to his question.

"3 hours?!" he yells as though it's a joke "that's it? That is how little importance you give to the fact that you where late? Enough that you think you can get away with it with only 3 hours of meditation?"

Force…..just being yelled at like this by him is punishment itself……..

"No master…." I whisper.

"I'm sorry Obi-Wan I didn't catch that, what?" He says almost mockingly.

"No master." I say a bit louder. Careful not to raise my voice the way I normally did when Obi-Wan said he couldn't hear me.

It strikes me deeply that I fear Qui-Gon far more than I do Obi-Wan.

I fear the one I have always looked up to rather than the one I thought intimidated me. In reality Obi-Wan never intimidated me. He spoke to me and I took advantage of it. I raised my voice and the worst Obi-Wan would do is continue to lecture calmly about what I should and shouldn't do. Qui-Gon I fear will bite my head off if I raise my voice to high.

"6 hours of meditation when we get back" Qui-Gon says solemnly. My jaw literally hangs open. 6 hours? Is this man trying to kill me????

"No Obi-Wan I do not wish to kill you. I wish to drive the darkness out of you" Qui-Gon says with an intense glare on his face.

Dammit I forgot to shield my thoughts! I immediately slam my shields up.

I really hope he didn't hear all that about me fearing him more than Obi-Wan.

And then what he said comes back to me…..drive the darkness out of me? Wait not me, Obi-Wan. He wants to drive the darkness out of Obi-Wan? Is this man mad?!

I immediately check my shields after that thought. Once I'm sure they're safely in place I continue to ponder.

What darkness? If there's one thing I know then it's that Obi-Wan Kenobi is **not** capable of doing anything dark. It's just not in his nature.

"Darkness master?" I mutter looking up at him for the first time. His midnight blue eyes are burning with anger and rage. I don't understand how he's calling Obi-Wan dark when he's the one loosing his temper.

"You don't realize it do you? The fact that your tardiness and the fact that you let out a massive amount of anger when you fight are signs of the dark side. You don't see that you're just like Xan-" Just when I think he can't get any louder, he chokes on his last word. His face is twisted with anger and emotion.

Xan? Why does that sound familiar.

And then the name of his former padawan comes back to me…..Xanatos.

Sithspit! He was comparing that scum to Obi-Wan?! Just because Obi-Wan probably let out his pent up anger and hurt while he was fighting? Because maybe he was a couple of minutes late to sparring cause maybe he wanted a word with his friends. Is that why?!

Suddenly I feel tears in my eyes as I realize…….letting out pent up emotions while fighting….running a little late to things because I had friends I wanted to talk to in the halls……that's all stuff I used to do......And you know what else? Unless I was well over an hour late Obi-Wan would never say anything about it. Even if I was a half an hour late he would just tell me to try to come earlier next time. That's it. And what did I do? I took advantage of it.

Damn. I never knew he took it easy on me cause he had to deal with all this crap when he was younger. I never knew he probably cut me a hell of a lot of slack because he knew what it was like.

Obi-Wan never said anything to me about letting out my anger while I fought. He didn't ever take it as signs of the dark side because he knew what it was like to be blamed for that. But what he didn't know…..was that I wasn't like him. He didn't know….and I don't think I did either….that I was dark. I deserved to be blamed for being dark. Not him. Not Obi-Wan. That's the last thing he deserved.

"How could you compare me to someone like….Xanatos?" I whisper, spitting out the last word. With tears in my eyes I look up at him. I see his jaw ripple twice before he raises his hand…and next thing I know, his large calloused hand makes contact with my right cheek and sends me soaring backwards.

Everything seems blurry for a second. And then I realize I'm on the ground, my cheek feels like its on fire, there are tears streaming down my face, and Qui-Gon is yelling:

"How dare you say that name in front of me?!" He growls.

My heart skips several beats when he begins to walk towards me. I scurry backwards what little I can before falling back, completely numb and terrified. But once he comes closer all my fear conveys one message to me:

_Get away from him_

Thankfully my mind complies. I manage to scramble onto my feet and run past him as fast as I possibly can.

I run out of the training ward and run towards our quarters. I barely even manage to remember where it is. All that my mind is comprehending right now is that Qui-Gon Jinn, the one man that I used to practically worship, and spend my days wishing would be my master; just slapped me.

Without any hesitation he slapped me. He slapped his own padawan! How could he?

Tear keep running down my face with those thoughts. Becoming more and more with every step I take.

It just really hurts me because I've never really been slapped before. Ever.

Not even Watoo ever slapped me.

And forget Obi-Wan. He couldn't even yell at me right. He would never even _think_ about slapping me. Never.

Maybe because he knew how painful it was to be slapped. He knew.

He knew and he made sure that I would never know. He made sure I would never know how painful any of it was.

Upon sharply turning a corner I see Master Windu walking down the hall. But I don't care.

As I run past him he gets a very concerned look on his face and says "Obi-Wan? Are you alright?"

But I don't answer him. I just run past him, tears gushing out of my eyes at a sudden thought.

I would feel safer with Master Windu now than with Qui-Gon.

As I run past without answering I faintly hear him growl "Damn it Qui-Gon what have you done to the boy this time?" then I hear his footsteps quicken, meaning he probably ran off to find Qui-Gon.

Master Windu's words strike me deeply:

"_Damn it Qui-Gon what have you done to the boy this time?"_

This time? Does that mean Qui-Gon has hurt Obi-Wan before?

Damn.

This one time alone is absolutely heart wrenching. Having this happen even a second time would kill me.

I finally make it home, better my room (more like Obi-Wan's room), lock myself in and collapse onto the bed. I spent I don't even know how long just crying.

Screaming and crying.

Knowing Qui-Gon wasn't home I screamed and cried off the top of my lungs.

I just want to go home. I want to go home and tell Obi-Wan how sorry I am and beg him to forgive me for all the times I've ever hurt him. Because his master hurt him and hell, his padawan hurt him, I don't think he deserves anymore hurt. Ever.

After what seemed like forever to me I run out of tears to cry.

At first I'm afraid to even move but then I realize that Qui-Gon still isn't home. So I get off the bed, my eyes all puffy and red. My throat, dry and coarse from screaming. My face soaking wet from all the tears.

And I decide to explore.

I start with the study desk at the corner of the room, which actually stayed there when Obi-Wan moved into Qui-Gon's room. So it became mine.

And as much as I expected to see my things when I opened one of the drawers on the side, I saw a pile of notebooks and folders. I empty the drawer of all it's contents and find that most of the notebooks are for classes and homework.

There's a couple of data pads as well but they're all for classes as well. And then a notebook, more like a diary catches my eye.

I pick it up and begin to open it but then close it and throw it back into the drawer, afraid to read what other horrors Obi-Wan has lived through.

And one other thing caught my eye. A folder.

And upon opening I found it was full of beautiful drawings. And even though they where all drawn in pencil they where incredible. All the detail and shades made them just breathtaking.

There where drawings of masters around the temple, the temple itself, and many other beautiful structures.

It took me a while to register that these where all drawn by Obi-Wan. The thought that someone like Obi-Wan could draw never even crossed my mind.

He just always seemed to busy for it. Well…..after the clone wars began he probably was.

I look through the folder at all the wonderful drawings of all the different places and all the different people until I come to the last one. The last drawing in that folder makes my emotions run wild.

Anger, fear, hurt, confusion, pain. All of it just rushed through me all at the same time as I see a neatly and beautifully shaded drawing of Qui-Gon Jinn.

I stare at it for a long time before stowing it back into the folder and putting everything back into Obi-Wan's drawer.

I then look on the desk where there's a framed picture of Obi-Wan with (dear force…) Bant, Garen and Reeft.

Bant I killed. Reeft I killed. Garen is somewhere off planet so he survived.

But it completely lifts my spirits to see them all so happy. They're all grinning like mad and the all have their arms around each other's shoulders.

Force….I've never seen any of them so happy while I was at the temple.

Guess things changed after Qui-Gon died.

And as if right on cue I hear the door to the quarters slide open and I hear a booming call of "Obi-Wan! Get out here right now!"

Force, what's he got to yell at me about now?

And then it hits me: I skipped all my classes today.

Stars he's gonna murder me. The aching returns to my cheek and suddenly I feel very weak. I don't even care that Qui-Gon's footsteps are drawing closer.

I walk over to the bed and just collapse onto it. Surrendering to my exhaustion for the second time since I was on Mustafar.

And the last thought that crossed my mind before I sank into unconsciousness was:

_How many years did Obi-Wan say he was under this madman's tutelage?_

**Wow ok guys before I even say anything about the story let me tell you that yesterday was the U.S premiere of the movie Taken in which Liam Neeson plays the main character, Bryan. And I have to say I had great expectations for the movie. Yeah my expectations where exceeded the first 15 mintues od the movie. I mean that movie was just mindblowing and completely heart pounding. It was incredible and I mean that's what you call a real action movie. Not the crap that they sell out now a days with all these new young people that go around blowing stuff up and running around with guns and I say that being young myself. I mean if every action movie was like this, stuff like Mission Impossible and Wanted and all that looks like crap. Taken was just so amazing I can't even describe it. It was awesome and hell I used to respect Liam Neeson and Piere Morel(the director for Taken), yeah now I worship them.**

**Ok now that i got that out of my system i really want ot thank you gus for giving me so many reviews on the last chapter. thanks it made me so happy reading all of them. thank you thank you thank you! Hope you like this chapter because it's my favorite and the amount of emotion in this chapter always gets to me. Hope u enjoyed and don't forget to review!**


	5. Sick

I wake up to someone shaking me by the shoulder.

And then someone with a more than familiar accent calls out to me in a very ginger tone "General Kenobi, wake up."

Did he just call me General…………….…..…._Kenobi_?

Oh force no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no

Pleasedon'tletmebeintheclonewarsasObi-Wan Pleasedon'tletmebeintheclonewarsasObi-Wan Pleasedon'tletmebeintheclonewarsasObi-Wan Pleasedon'tletmebeintheclonewarsasObi-Wan

But much to my horror, I crack and eye open and see……….a clone trooper (which mortifies me to a degree because the first thing that pops into my head when I see a clone trooper is invading the Jedi Temple with a whole army of them……killing the younglings, ordering them to kill anyone they find…….)

Force no. I've heard of all the crap Obi-Wan had to deal with during the clone wars, and even though I didn't give back then, I know that even now I wouldn't be able to bear half the things he did.

And about being a General? I know Obi-Wan definitely didn't become a General by looking pretty. I don't know a thing about being one of the most renown generals of the clone wars.

"Are you alright General?" the clone asks resting his hand on my shoulder.

"Who are you?" I mutter bluntly, sitting up. I regret it immediately because as soon as I do my back strongly protests against it, my head gives a quick spin, and an unimaginable sense of hunger spikes in my stomach. It causes me to squeeze my eyes shut in the pain.

"It's me General, Alpha" the trooper says "Are you feeling alright?" he asks again.

Alpha….Alpha…..oh yeah, he was one of Obi-Wan's best troopers. I heard the two where pretty close during the war. Oh what he must have felt when the same trooper tried to kill him during Order 66.

"Yes I'm fine" I lie. I mean what the hell am I supposed to say?

_Oh you know I'm trapped in the body of my former master almost a decade in the past???????_

Force……..what is this crazy game that the force is playing with me? My thoughts are interrupted by that sharp need for food. Force, how long has it been since the last time I've eaten?

Actually better question, how long has it been since Obi-Wan's eaten, because technically I'm in his body so how long he hasn't eaten is what matters.

"Good, there's been a separatist attack, 4 bases away and it would be best to evacuate as soon as possible. Best be safe with you General, because it wouldn't be good if we where attacked with you in this condition" Alpha says with concern in his voice. Wow I actually didn't know clones had the ability to speak that way. With emotion and all.

Guess being around Obi-Wan brings out a soft side in everyone. Except me of course.

Sith Lords don't have a soft side.

"Where are the others?" I ask trying to keep up a conversation so he doesn't suspect me of being anyone other that Obi-Wan.

"They're waiting outside. We've already evacuated and packed anything that's needed. We wanted to wait as long as we could before waking you" He says with a slightly reassuring expression "You're tired, we know, but we have to leave."

I can hear the sympathy in his voice. I guess people have a tendency of learning to unconditionally care about Obi-Wan after being around him too. Except me of course.

Sith Lords don't care unconditionally for anyone.

"Here, let me help you up" he says pulling one of my arms around his shoulder. He slowly and carefully helps me stand.

You know I'm starting to wonder what's wrong with Obi-Wan to begin with. Is he like injured or something?

And where the hell am I? Like clone wars me, where is he…or me…..or-you know what….whatever.

As we step out of the base Alpha allows me to try and stand on my own, which I find very achingly hard to do for some reason.

I suddenly look around and get struck by de ja vu.

The muddy wet ground, the foggy air; it's just all too familiar. Oh and lets not forget the hunger that's bothering me again…..

The other 5 clones gather around me and Alpha.

"Where are we headed to General?" one of them asks.

"We head to the next base. Round up all the clones there and then contact the council about this" I say, trying to sound like I just devised that. Actually that's what Obi-Wan told me to do in case there's ever an attack on my or any other base.

"Yes sir" all of them say in unison.

"Alright then let's move" Alpha says beginning to lead the way.

Best follow him because I have no idea where the hell we are.

But as soon as I take some 25 steps, I feel my stomach churn and my legs threaten to give out on me. And suddenly I feel very, very tired and actually allow my legs to completely give out underneath me.

Big mistake.

Because next thing I know, I'm on my hands and knees in the mud, vomiting out all the contents in my stomach.

I vaguely wonder how that's possible considering Obi-Wan probably hasn't eaten in days, meaning my stomach was already empty.

But that thought is quickly shoved out of my mind as (after what seems like many many torturous seconds) I stop throwing up, but remain on the ground, my breathing heavy and my throat, raw.

Actual tears in my eyes from the shear pain shooting up my throat and stomach.

Far too tired to even think about moving.

My vision blurs and I think I throw up a little more before completely collapsing into the mud and rolling slowly and onto my back. A pained groan tears out of my throay

I suddenly register hands on my shoulders and voices around me:

"General! General, are you alright? General-Shit-Cody, go see if there's a spare medic kit inside, there's a good chance he pulled the wound"

"Yes sir"

"You! Get inside, unpack anything that can possibly help, blankets, gauze, disinfectant, anything, you hear me?"

"Yes sir"

"Rex, come here, help me get him up"

But before either of them even try to lift me onto my feet I feel one last shot of pain jolt through me and then complete darkness.

**I'm sorry for the long wait guys. And I'm also sorry this chapter's so short. And I'm also sorry this chapter doesn't say or explain what's wrong with Obi-Wan, but you'll find out next chapter, promise! But what you do know is that he's in his 30's and come on....as much as we hate to admit it....there are some things a man his age just isn;t built to do anymore...... XD**

**Hope you liked it and please review!!!**


	6. The Call

I wake up to the strong smell of coffee…..wait coffee?

I crack an eye open and find myself staring up at the roof of a tent. Just great, I take it I'm still in the clone wars.

I push myself to sit up as slowly as I possibly can (careful not to do anything that would cause something like what happened outside.)

Hm…..this isn't the tent I was in when I first came to the Clone Wars………….I scan around the tent and find no one around.

But looking in front of me, out the slightly unzipped door I see a light. At first I think it's daylight seeping in, but then I realize the light's a dim golden color.

I suddenly look up and see a very dim golden bulb hanging over my head as well. Which could only mean this was a jointed tent. There was another room directly in front of mine.

I remember using these a lot because I wanted privacy from my clones. I also remember Obi-Wan telling me he hated using these unless it was an utter emergency. He told me he felt bad making all the clones attempt to make themselves comfortable in one small room while he had all this leisure space.

Always caring about other, that man.

I am brought back to reality through the voice of one of the clones:

"We are at a small campground a good few miles away from the next base, sir. We decided to wait till morning to continue to the base, seeing General Kenobi collapsed a while back."

"What?! Is he alright?" Wait……was that….was that Garen's voice??? Is he here? Force I'm gonna have a kriffing heart attack if I have to even look at him. Force…….I thought Garen fought mostly on systems on the other side of the galaxy from Obi-Wan and me…………..

"Physically yes, he's alright. But he's still asleep. I'm pretty sure he just needs some rest as of now" the trooper answers.

"Shithspit…….alright then-" Garen's voice is cut of by the sharp noise of static. Then it hits me. He's not here, he's just on the comm. or sending the clones holo-messages "Sorry, the connection in these parts are terrible" he continues.

"It's alright, sir" the clone says.

"Listen, if Obi-Wan's conditions worsen then let me know. I'm not too far away and I'll drop by if needed. Even request the council to take him off the field for a while if necessary" there's something in Garen's voice that I am very much familiar with.

Exhaustion.

He sounds so tired. So frustrated and in need of rest.

"Yes General Muln" the trooper answers.

"Is Anakin with you? If he is then let me speak to him" Garen says.

"He…..he's not here. He's on Coroscant giving the council a report, sir" the trooper answers hesitantly.

_What?! I'm right here!! I'm right here dammit, right here!_

I want to scream. But of course that will get me no where but the temple soul and mind healers offices.

"Stars end! Where the hell is Skywalker when you need him?! Why can't that boy ever even bother to look after his master?" Garen actually almost looses it for a second. . I hear him sigh.

"General?" the clone asks with Garen's lack of response.

"You know what, never mind. Just…just look after Obi-Wan alright? Just make sure he gets some food and any fluid in him every once in a while. Please Alpha, I'm counting on you. You and your boys" Garen says, the tiredness returning to his voice.

"We won't let you down sir. That's a promise" Alpha, I figure out the clone is (sorry they all seem to sound the same…..Obi-Wan never shared that thought with me thought. He always said each clone was different in their own special way and it was easy to differentiate them) says adamantly.

"Good. I'll catch up with you boys again as soon as I can" Garen pauses for a moment as all the troopers in unison let out a "yessir" before he says "Muln out" and hangs up the transmission.

Now, what was that bit about me being on Corscant?

Suddenly it hits me. This must be one of the many time I went to Corscant to report. Then stayed back a day or two with Padme.

Dammit.

Is this what happened while I was gone? Obi-Wan never even told me he had been this……this….sick.

I hate using that word. Especially on Obi-Wan. It's just so unlike him to be…….sick.

He always did look a bit out of it when I returned but he acted like everything was normal.

And when his face would suddenly twist in pain and he would waver on his legs for a moment before regaining his posture I always passed it off as a battle injury and kept walking. I never even imagined he would have been so horribly…..sick. If I knew I would have helped him instead of waiting for a clone to do that job for me.

And to think all this is from lack of food. The fact that everything in his system was absolutely messed up.

And that I am no where to be seen because I am blinded by love. So blinded the closest person I have to a father is half dead in the inside and I am planets away flirting with my wife.

I, the closest person he has to a son was not there to help him. No. His clone troopers did that job. Maybe that's why he never told me he was like this. Because he was hurt his clones had to my job for me.

Speaking of clones, I hear one of the clones sigh "So how long are we going to be here?"

"As long as it takes for General Kenobi to recover" I think Alpha responds.

"It's so unlike him to actually collapse while we're fleeing. I mean we've done this before and he's never passed out until we got to the next base" the first clone exclaims.

It entertains me to no end how much these simple clones care for their general.

_It also entertains me to no end how much that simple general cares for his clones…_

But really. Those clones probably know more about Obi-Wan's conditions more than I do. The thought makes me ashamed to a degree.

The clone's words return to me:

"_It's so unlike him to actually collapse while we're fleeing. I mean we've done this before and he's never passed out until we got to the next base"_

A two things occurs to me.

1) Force…….this has happened to Obi-Wan before? Like more than once? Stars that one ordeal made me want to kill myself just to end the pain…..having to deal with it again??? It would seriously kill me.

2) I felt the nausea kick in less than a minute after I walked out of the base. Which means Obi-Wan had the nausea kick into his system less than a minute after he walked out of the base.

And then he held it in and continued on until he got to the next base. Force knows how far that may be.

"I know it's like he's a completely different person now" one of the clones mutters.

He doesn't know how right he is.

I decide I should go talk to the clones…..try to find out anymore information that I may not know about Obi-Wan.

But that idea completely goes down the drain when all my energy suddenly seems to drain out of me. And I can't help but close my eyes and sink back into blissful and ignorant sleep.

**Sorry if theres a bajillion spelling mistakes here guys. It's like 3:30 am and im barely even lucid enough to recognize my own voice at this moment. So if there are any mistakes, tell me and i'll fix them later.**

**lol enter the concerned brotherly Garen XD My "Someday" readers, you know how much I love him and I couldn't help but bring him in XD  
**

**Plus do u want Anakin to stay in the Clone Wars for one more chapter or should he move on to the next saga of Obi-Wan's life? I need ur votes cause i can't decide =]**

**Review guys!!!  
**


	7. Wake

**Hey guys, I apologize sincerely for the ridiculously long time it took to post this. Truth be told, I had a bit of writers block with it, but it's good now =] Enjoy!**

**Oh and please forgive any spelling errors or anything like that, cause if you're one of my Someday readers you'll know I have a terrible habit of updating so late at night I'm surprised I haven't passed out yet. So yeah...Enjoy!**

"General? General please wake up!"

There is urgency in the voice of whoever it is that wakes me from my sleep. Although I am fully conscious I find it so hard to open my eyes and face the cold hard reality.

That was the voice of a clone.

Suddenly I feel something cold pressing against my mouth. It parts my lips and then a warm liquid trickles into my mouth, very little at a time. And once it goes down my throat I realize what it is.

Water. It's water. Sweet sweet water.

I really hadn't realized how parched I was until now. How close I was to dehydration.

The clone seems to be pouring very little into my mouth probably to ensure I don't choke in unconsciousness. I find myself wanting more after a few seconds. The small streams of water are anything but satisfying.

At that I attempt to lift my head, which completely startles whichever clone was holding the cup to my lips. He jerks backward, spilling the contents of the cup all over my face and chest.

And some of the water spilled on my face makes its way through my nose, causing me to feel absolutely nauseous. I start to cough madly.

"What the hell did you do to him?! Force……get lost!" I hear a more than familiar voice at my side.

Looking over I see an 18 year old version of…..myself. 18 year old Anakin Skywalker sits before me.

My eyes go wide at the sight of him-er me.

"I'm sorry sir" my thoughts and shock are interrupted by the immensely nervous clone in front of me.

"It's alri-"

"Just get lost!" the younger me cuts me off and yells at the clone.

The poor clone scrambles to get away from the younger me, but I stop him with a hand "Really it's ok-" once again the younger me cuts me off.

"But master-" Force….why am I, well younger me being so…..so…….so irrational?!

"Anakin!" wow it feels strange saying my own name… "Stop this. It's alright it was a mistake" I growl.

"Yes master" the younger me mutter and bows his head. Heh, if Obi-Wan had a credit for every time I did that he would be rich enough to buy himself out of being the unfortunate master of me.

"Are you ok? You don't look too good" the young man in front of me inquires.

"I'm fine no thanks to you" I growl in a rather un-Obi-Wan like way.

"I'm sorry master, I shouldn't have taken so long in Coroscant" he says quietly. His voice is obedient but suspicious at the same time. I feel his suspicion towards me. I have to calm down. Sound like Obi-Wan. Sound strict and like a terrible man that cares about nothing but the rules. Right.

That should be just about…impossible.

"Alright then, but just don't do it again padawan. Might I ask what took you so long?" Force, I feel like slapping myself the second those words leave my mouth. What am I trying to humiliate the younger me? I mean I already know what I/ he was doing on Coroscant, why did I need to go on and ask??

I sigh, I'm definitely overdoing the Obi-Wan now.

"I-I uh, you know what I was doing Master. I um the council asked me to report remember? They…asked me about several extra topics" the younger me musters up an excuse "That and the weather down on Coroscant is terrible. It took forever to get a clear to take off" he says now stabilizing his excuse.

"I see" I say stroking my beard, which I know is one of Obi-Wan's oldest habit "Just see to it that it doesn't happen again, alright?" I say. The younger me nods.

I remember that was the one thing Obi-Wan always said to me after I did this kind of stuff 'See to it that it doesn't happen again, alright?'

He always said that to me. Always.

It's strange because I told him it was because of the weather….something I don't have any control over. And he still said, make sure it doesn't happen again.

As though he knew that weather wasn't nearly the reason why I was so late.

What if…..what if he knew what I was doing? What if he knew I was married to Padme, and visited her every chance I got? I mean he always knew that I had that crazy infatuation with her. And that's all I ever made it look like. I never made it obvious that we where married or anything!

But this is Obi-Wan Kenobi we're talking about here. If there's anyone that is even likely to find out then it's him.…but if he did find out then why didn't he tell the council? Get me suspended? Why didn't he tell me?

…

And the it hits me. Hits me so hard it almost knocks the breath out of me.

He wanted me to tell him

He trusted me so much that he though eventually, one day, I would have told him.

Too bad I never had any intentions to do that. Nope. Not once.

Suddenly a clone barges through the doors of the tent, breathing heavily he gasps "General, someone just took out our destination. The second base is…is no more" he pants.

"And the troops?" the younger me blurts out

"All dead sir" the clone replies.

"Sithspit!" younger me curses.

"Language padawan" I blurt out from force of habit. Force, having trained Asohka is getting to me. The younger me glares disapprovingly at my comment.

Funny how whenever Obi-Wan said it to me I wanted to punch him, and yet here I am saying it myself and when I say it, it doesn't seem wrong at all. Curious.

"Sir, we have to evacuate immediately" the clone say, urgency in his voice.

"Of course" I respond. I see the younger me open his mouth to protest, probably about the fact that I can't even walk properly, but I raise a hand and stop him. It takes an unusual amount of force but finally after what seemed like hours (but was probably seconds in reality) I manage to support my own weight to stand. And it really doesn't help that unlike me, Obi-Wan _had _to wear such heavy protective gear. He always worked in the more brutal places than I.

But after I do manage to pick myself up, the clone leads me and padawan me out into the dank foggy day where another clone approaches us "Sir, there's absolutely no connection to any of the other bases, we can't reach them at all."

"That's not good. That and…" I let my mind stray from the clone's words. Something in the force tugs at me, pulling my attention away from reality and towards it. I don't even know what it is, but it gives me a terrible feeling. A feeling of dread I guess.

And then I see it. I see it coming even before it comes into our range.

I see the ion canon blast….coming straight for us. And even though the force screams at me to warn the clones, my younger self, anyone, to get away from here as soon as possible…my mind just doesn't register it.

I stand there immobile in shock for a good 5 seconds before it arrives.

At the speed of light, the blast comes crashing down right between me and my younger self. An incredible groundbreaking roar comes to my ears as I am thrown off my feet and hurled several feet away.

A loud crack comes to my ears as my back makes contact with the ground and a few more when the momentum of the blow causes me to roll over a few times. My strength finally leaves me after I am turned onto my back for the millionth time. My vision blurs and red hot liquid dribbles down my forehead all the way to my chin. Everything is so foggy…Everything's going dark….so dark…until finally…finally…it's all Black.

**1)I'm definately not too happy with this chapter. I'm convinced it's bad, short and vague. What do you think?**

**2)Next chapter is reader's choice, where do you want to see Anakin next? Because this was the last chapter in the Clone Wars, so what next?**

**3)You'll see that Anakin is being incredibly fickle here, I mean one second he's like "I have to act like the terrible Obi-Wan Kenobi" and the next second he's like "I finally know how Obi-Wan feels." That kind of thing adds to showing how young and immature Anakin still is, and it will continue. Just thought I'd let you guys know =]**

**Review and The Force Will Be With You! Remember, the more reviews the sooner the next chapter wil be up! XD  
**


	8. Revalations

**A much faster and longer update =] There you go guys, hope you're happy =] Enjoy the Ani angst XD  
**

As soon as I wake up, one thing and one thing only registers in my head.

My back hurts like a freaking bantha. I mean it's not even funny.

And then it comes back to me. Getting thrown to the ground by that crazy ion blast. Probably snapping my spine in two. The thought of having my spine snapped in half actually scares me a lot more than I thought it would.

After a while of laying there in my own pain, I decide to open my eyes. And much to my surprise, I'm not in a tent……I'm in the healer's ward in the temple……I'M OUT OF THE CLONE WARS! I could have jumped up and done a little dance out of happiness that I was finally out of that wretched time.

….That is if my back weren't half past dead.

"Master Kenobi?" an unbelievably familiar voice calls from my side. I manage to turn my head and see that sitting at my bedside is….Ahsoka Tano. My breath hitches in my throat at the sight of her young worried face. And once again a very familiar thought runs through my head:

Ikilledher.

Ikilledher. Ikilledherincoldbloodymurderanddidn'thavearegreteventhoughshewasmyloyalpadawanforyears. Ikilledher.

"Master Kenobi, are you alright?" she asks. I guess she noticed all the color drain from my face. In an attempt to look perfectly fine, I try to sit up. My back strongly protests against it but I do it anyway.

"I'm definitely doing better" I say trying to muster up that smile that Obi-Wan always gave people when he was without a doubt hurt beyond belief on the inside but trying to cover it up. Believe me I know that smile very…very well.

"Oh, good" Ahsoka smiles "I made sure I gave Skyguy a serious yelling at for getting you stuck in a mess like that. I really don't know what gets to him sometimes. I mean why would he even try to pull something like that? If Cody hadn't come in Skyguy's crazy plan would have killed you for sure" she says in a very much serious tone.

I vaguely wonder what it is that I did that almost got Obi-Wan killed this time. I've pulled many crazy tactics with him and he's survived through most of them….

"It's alright. Anakin has done worse" I smile. This time, as hard as I try to make it genuine it doesn't work. The smile becomes bittersweet. The tone of Ahsoka's voice is really getting to me. She really sounds annoyed at me. I mean me, me, not Obi-Wan, me.

"Ahsoka, why are you here? Where's Anakin?" I ask. I'm finding it increasingly hard to keep calling my…my former….padawan by her actual name.

"He's in I don't know doing I don't care" she says with a slight twitch. Wow she must be really irritated at me…but why? She always seemed so free and playful around me…

"What's wrong padawan?" I ask suddenly with genuine concern.

"Nothing it's just that…I don't know master. He's not changing. Really I mean he's so frustrating!" She screams the last part. I wonder if she's talking about me…"You know how you always say he's a good guy and he's a bit anti-social but he gets along after a while?"

I just nod, having no idea what she's talking about. That and slightly surprised that Obi-Wan would have told her such a lie. I barely ever get along with anyone new…

"Well he's not. I mean I've known him for almost a year now and he's still so….agh!!" She says with a growl. I feel slightly dejected…why would she say that about me?

"Why is that?" I manage to let my confusion out through words.

"Because he's so cold and mysterious towards everyone! Including me! I mean I'm his padawan now! You think I'd know a little more than his name, former master and home planet! Seriously, that's all I know about him!" Ahsoka almost screams.

I feel my jaw physically hang open for a while

….She's right! And I don't even know that much about her!

"And I swear he's like…he's like a father to me now! A-and I really really want to impress him and I really need his approval! It's not fair!" My former padawan's choked up words strike me deeply. And suddenly a sense of déjà vu fills me up as I remember saying the exact words to the Chancellor. I remember a year into my own apprenticeship I spoke the exact words to the Chancellor.

"And he nit picks everything!" She adds "He somehow manages to see every single thing I do wrong, gives me a pep talk about how he knows how it feels and then walks away all mysteriously, expecting me to solve the issue on my own! I'm a kriffing padawan because I need to be guided, not left on my own!"

Ah…see that is where Ahsoka and I differ. Obi-Wan would always try to help me solve my problems. I left Ahsoka to do things her way. Really I never meant any harm. It absolutely aggravated me that Obi-Wan thought I wasn't capable of fixing my own problems (no one really is, I know now) so I thought Ahsoka would think things the same way. I forget that she isn't me. I forget that she can't be who I wanted to be and how I wanted to live my life.

"I see, have you tried talking to him about it?" I ask defending myself.

"Yeah, ok sure, you try to find time to actually have a decent talk with the great almighty Chosen One/Great Commander Skywalker. You just try…oh wait it wouldn't be too hard for you because you're like his best friend! How in the name of the force did you get so close to him Master?" Ahsoka rambles. She looks slightly delirious.

"I…um…I…" How did Obi-Wan get so close to me?

"Come on master you have to help me. I really don't know how much longer I can just act like I'm super happy with him. I mean he's just so hard to deal with!" Ahsoka sighs. I can tell she's suppressing tears.

I feel absolutely shattered that even she would think of me that way…but maybe because…maybe I was that way. I never really thought of it that way. I always thought that they where all against me. Not once did I think I might be going against them. I always wanted to have things my way and went beserk with rage and anger when I didn't. It's just the way I was…come to think of it I really don't even know why I acted so…so…so thick back then…

"You know how I got along with Anakin?" I say suddenly.

She looks up at me with pleading eyes "I dealt with him. I dealt with and joked with him on the subject of just about everything. Anakin always liked to have things his way. Let him have it and he'll be fine with you. I know it may be a bit irritating at first but believe me you'll get used to it. I mean I did" I say the last part with a fake smile.

"Ok…I'll try. Thanks master" Ahsoka smiles at me. And it's not that adamant grin of hers, but a genuine happy smile. Something that's very new to me.

Suddenly there's a knock on the door.

Ahsoka and I both turn our heads to look and see Mace Windu at the door. Unlike most of the others I've seen that I've killed, seeing him doesn't make me feel guilty.

…It absolutely mortifies me.

I killed him so brutally. It was my final act before surrendering into…Palpatine. I realize only now that he was right. Right about everything. And as terrible as he behaved with me, things would have gone better if I had listened to him. And we all know it.

"May I come in?" he asks politely, still standing at the door.

"Of course master" I say quietly.

"I should be going then. Feel better Master Obi-Wan" Ahsoka says sensing Master Windu wants to speak to me in privacy.

I nod and she stands, and walks out.

"She's a good kid" Master Windu says in a very un-jedi like manner.

"Yes she is" I reply truthfully. He walks in and sits on the chair Ahsoka was just occupying.

"How are you feeling?" he asks as soon as he gets comfortable.

"Good I guess…Can I help you with anything?" I ask, not too sure how to approach him. After all I had no idea what kind of a relationship he and Obi-Wan shared.

"Why the sudden formality my young friend?" he smiles lightly "Actually I wanted to speak to you about your former apprentice."

I actually groan "Why is it that everyone comes to me when they have to talk about Anakin??"

"Because you are the only one that really understands him" he states simply.

_Understanding_

It's what started this whole thing to begin with.

"_No! You don't understand. You never understood me"_

"_How could I understand you if you never understood me?!" _

The fact that there was absolutely no understanding between the two of us.

_Feel…..strange. Everything ever done…all wrong. All wrong. _

_Steps back. Flat ground........_

_Surrender. Give into exhaustion. _

_Let go. Collapse onto…Mustafarian gravel. _

I suddenly register someone shaking my shoulders. And as I snap back into reality I realize its Mace.

"Obi-Wan, are you alright? You zoned out for a minute there"

"Huh? Oh, yes I'm fine" I mutter forcing my agonizing memories into the back of my head "So what about Anakin?"

"Do you know where he is?" Mace asks seriously.

"No…" I answer with a slightly confused tone.

"Do you ever know where he is?"

"No…"

"We're concerned about him" Of course. Of course the council is concerned about me. They always are….but then again….they where just about right about me weren't they?

"What about him?"

"He's been interacting with the Chancellor a lot…again" Mace sighs.

I spit out the first thing that pops into my head "After I've told him not to only for the millionth time?" I almost laugh at how Obi-Wan-ish that sounds.

"Yes. I want you to try to talk to him again Obi-Wan. His defiance is endangering him"

"He's not in danger of anything! Anakin's perfectly reasonable in everything he does!" I barely manage to contain the anger that bubbles inside me from being called dangerous.

Mace gives an irritated groan and buries his face into his hands. And glares at me as he brings it back up "Why Obi-Wan? Why in the name of the Force do you keep doing this to me and the rest of the council? Why?"

I just raise a brow, having not a single clue as to what he was talking about.

"Why do you always kriffing defend the boy? You know he's doing wrong! You know he's disobeying every single rule the order knows! You know everything! You know what he does when he's not at the temple, and you still don't do anything about it!" Mace almost screams. It actually surprises me to a degree to see him loose his stoic mask like that "Do you know how badly he's violating the code with a kriffing senator?! And still you waste a solid hour begging and pleading to Master Yoda to not kick him out of the order! Master Yoda could dammit kick you out of the order alone for trying to keep such a person in the order! I wish I had a credit for every single time you wasted your time begging and pleading on your knees in front of us to give Anakin another chance. How many chances is it going to take before your precious padawan actually shows us he's worth staying in this order?!"

I…am shocked speechless.

I have no idea which part of that to comprehend first. The part about Master Windu knowing about me and Padme…or the part about Obi-Wan spending hours trying to convince the council to let me stay.

I am absolutely shocked beyond belief that Master Windu knows. Which means that Master Yoda definitely knew. So how in the name of the force did I not get kicked out?

This brings me to my guilt. My utterly unbearable guilt. I was able to stay because Obi-Wan begged them to let me stay. He actually spent hours trying to cover for me. Him. Obi-Wan Kenobi. Did such a thing…for me. The man I thought hated me with his existance put his own knighthood on the line for me?

I open my mouth to reply but Mace cuts me off "You know what forget it" he grumbles rubbing his forehead "Just forget it. The Chancellor wants to see you and Anakin."

My heart skips several beats at the thought of meeting up with the Chancellor.

"He wanted to see Anakin alone, but you should probably go along with him" he says, calming down a bit.

I just nod, keeping my head low.

"I'm sorry Obi-Wan" he says suddenly putting a hand on my shoulder "I shouldn't have said any of that. You have things hard enough as is. No need for me to make things worse" he looks up into my eyes. Concern is radiating off of him "Anyway" he takes a deep breath and his hand off my shoulder "I should get going. You go on, get ready go to the Chancellor before he gets impatient" he says with a delicate smile. Then stands and leaves.

I let out a breath as he closes the door behind him.

Still trying to contemplate what just happened.

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After pulling myself together and forcing my weary body to stop screaming at me in protest, I manage to somehow limp out of the temple and take an air-taxi to the senate building (force-forbid I try to drive in a situation like this.)

Once I finally get nearby, I pay the taxi driver and ask him to wait a while. It occurs to me a little too late that the younger me had probably come here in his speeder and we would end up driving home together anyway.

I shake my head at my own stupidity and begin to walk towards the senate building.

I stop some 20 feet away from the entrance and look up at the magnificent building. It's been so long…

My eyes scan the entire building, balcony after balcony until I find the one. Padme's balcony.

The one I've been on so many times. Just holding her. Enjoying her presence…her love.

And then suddenly…out of no where, two figures appear out onto the balcony. Padme, and the younger me. I study both of the figures with crystal clear vision only a Jedi could attain. The younger me is holding Padme against the rail of the balcony…just as I remember doing many many times.

Suddenly something hits me. If I'm Obi-Wan right now, and Obi-Wan was assigned to go find me at the senate building does that mean that…does that mean that at some point Obi-Wan…Obi-Wan saw this??

Force…Obi-Wan saw this. Of course he did. If I could catch it then there's no way he could miss it! Dammit! How could I be so blind?!

Agh…

Frustrated with myself I manage to pull myself out of my shock and enter the building. I have a younger self to face.

**Hey guys, you know the drill. It's insanely late I'm delusional and I can't spell for crap when I'm hallucinating =]**

**lol hope u liked the long chapter. Confrontation with Palpy is in the next chapter. Then there might be one or two more chapters, then an epilouge and we're done! Sad, but yeah!  
**


	9. Humiliated

**Hey guys .Sorry this took a while but here you go. And please please disregard any spelling errors or anything related to that cause its late and I'm half past dead =] Enjoy!**

Upon walking up to Padme's door, something occurs to me.

How on Coroscant was I supposed to explain to the younger me of why I decided to look for him here?

The thought is cast aside as I hear voices inside. I attune my senses and listen.

"I know, I'll come by tomorrow, I promise" That voice….it's me…. "I wanna stay too but knowing the council, they'll probably send Obi-Wan to search for me in no time"

"Ok then. Stay safe alright? Please Ani…" Force….Padme…that's Padme…..

Padme's still alive-

And just then, just as I'm about to sink into the thoughts of my wife, the door wrenches open. Light seeps out into the hallway and onto me.

The younger me, who was the one that had opened the door, looks up. And as he sees me, he freezes. Shock. Blind shock fills his expression and all the color leaves his face.

His mouth forms an "o" and I take that as a sign that I should speak.

"Anakin, I was just looking for you..." I say with that calm Obi-Wan voice that says 'I wasn't doing anything suspicious before you found me....'

"For me master?" my younger self manages to say.

"Yes you, Anakin, the chancellor wants to see you" I answer firmly.

"Oh...alright....wait....why did you come here? How did you know to find me here?" the younger me narrows his eyes as suspicion creeps into his voice.

"I didn't" I respond quickly "I just assumed the senator would know where you where."

"Oh..ok...lets go then..." the younger me actually bought it. Funny enough. Without a single goodbye or anything to Padme, he walks out into the hallway with me, and we begin to head up to the chancellor's quarters.

"Master, why are you coming?" the younger me asks after a while.

Mentioning the council would be a terrible mistake at the moment so I decide to go with something else "I am free tonight and I thought we could have dinner after your meeting with the chancellor."

"Oh...alright, sure" younger me agrees.

"What, afraid I'm gonna intrude upon your game with the chancellor of 'Bash-The-Obi-Wan?'" I joke.

"Master, you know I would never do such thing" the younger me lies with a light wine to his voice.

"Of course you wouldn't..." I say, the smile still on my face.

"Please Master, if anything I should accuse you of playing "Bash-The-Chosen-One with the council" the younger me retorts.

"You know I don't do that" I say, most of the joking tone leaving my voice.

Neither of us says anything else until we reach the chancellor's office. The younger me does not hesitate to just walk in, but I take a moment to stare at the door and really think over if I want to face him or not. If I can really shield myself well enough so he can't tell I'm not Obi-Wan.

The younger me pokes his head out the door "The chancellor asks if you are coming in"

"Hm? Oh yes..." I mutter jerking out of my thoughts. Well, better pray I can shield myself well enough. I've been a sith and back so I guess I can-

….Suddenly my last thought sinks in.....I've been a sith and back...........I have been a sith......but.....have I really been back?

"Obi-Wan!" younger me calls. I look up at him again "Don't make me drag you in here..."

"Alright, alright" I say with a bit of humor behind my voice "sheesh...so impatient" I mutter walking past him, into the office.

"Like master, like padawan" the younger me jokes. And I would have turned around to glare at him, had a familiar booming voice not cut me off :

"Master Kenobi! Delighted to see you my friend" I look up and see the gruesome and stoic face of Chancellor-I mean Emperor Palpatine. He is standing in the middle of his office, beaming (or at least his definition of beaming) at me.

"G-good to see you as well, Chancellor" I force myself to bow and then speak.

"Are you feeling alright? You look like you have just seen a ghost!" he laughs. Yeah...more like cackles.

"Yes-yes I am fine thank you" I answer.

"So what is it you wanted to speak to me about?" the younger me says stepping up next to me.

"Ah yes, Anakin. I did not expect your master to come along" his eyes flicker to me for a moment before returning to the younger me "So I guess our topic of discussion can wait until later." I barely suppress a smirk.

He then turns and returns to his desk. The younger me and I remain where we are, and the chancellor speaks as he sits down "So tell me Anakin, how is your training going? I heard that despite your status as a knight, Master Kenobi has decided to continue helping you out..."

"Anakin is my equal now, and I would prefer to call it building up his skills, Chancellor" I say with a bit of an irritated tone. What is this man trying to do?

"I believe I spoke to Anakin, yes?" Palpatine turns to me with a deadly expression. I stare into it until the younger me speaks "It's good I guess. I'm a knight now....but I a little extra practice never killed anyone...right?" he says with a flat tone. As though he's just saying it so it wouldn't make the Jedi look bad.

"Of course not...but you would think that after you've achieved such a great accomplishment, as to getting knighted...your master would give you some...freedom. I know I would if I where him" the chancellor says turning to me with his last words. The cunning expression remains on his face.

"Like I said before, Anakin is my equal now. I am no longer his master. He is allowed just as much free time as I am" I state.

"Yes but what is the point if it is wasted on what you wish him to do?" Palpatine says too fast to be considered normal.

"It is not what I wish to do, it is what he wishes to do as well. Anakin understands full well the need of extra work and training. Especially during times like this when we're in war" I say fully irritated now. It's as though he's trying to-....wait that's it! He's trying to provoke me! Dammit! I can't believe I didn't see this coming! He's trying to provoke Obi-Wan in front of my younger self! It makes perfect sense! Damn, I can't believe I let myself just walk into this.

"What do you say my boy?" Palapatine say turning to Anakin.

Suddenly I turn to him as well. Force of all the times to say something against Obi-Wan I'd say this would have to be the worst.

"The war is important...but doing what I please is...important too...and everyone doesn't want to train 24/7....." the younger me says looking anywhere but at me. I can tell he's trying to pick sides. Mind goes to me. Heart goes to Palpatine. Biggest mistake I ever made.

"As you see Master Kenobi, young Skywalker has chosen his human side of his Jedi. Perhaps...you should have spent a little more time teaching your apprentice about....loyalty" Palpatine smirks.

My eyes dart to my younger self who is trying to avoid my gaze. How could he choose the chancellor over me? In an argument that was obviously set up. Dammit, I feel myself turn away from the chancellor in embarrassment. Embarrassment that soon turns to anger. What was the younger me thinking?! Didn't he even once think of how humiliated I would be?

…....Didn't I even once think of how humiliated Obi-Wan would be?

How could I be so stupid? How could I have been so blindly stupid to have agreed with the chancellor? Force.

Loyalty. Perhaps I do need a lesson in loyalty. And who to trust.

"Well, it has been good talking to you Master Kenobi but it is late and Master Yoda will be wondering where you two are" Palpatine says, looking satisfied with himself. Damn bastard.

"Of course Chancellor, it was nice talking to you as well. Good night" the younger me says with a smile as he turns to walk out of the office. I glare at Palpatine. And then he speaks up "Oh and, ahm...what is it that you Jedi say.....ah yes, May The Force Be With You" he gives me a dark look. One that makes me feel like crawling into a hole and dying.

I turn away and follow my younger self out of the office. Happy to be out of that disgusting place. Equally disgusted thought, to still be in the presence of the younger me. Force, how could I be so incompetent?!

I walk out of the senate building several steps ahead of him, silent throughout the entire walk.

As soon as I step out, the younger me jogs to my side "ok then, my speeder's at the east parking lot" I resist the urge to turn around and smack him when he says that. How could he act so normal after what just happened?!

Suddenly my comm link beeps. I immediately pick it our of my belt and retrieve the call.

"Kenobi"

"Obi-Wan, find your apprentice yet?" comes the voice of Master Windu.

"Yes.." I mutter.

"Oh good. Where was he? The 'club with his friends' as usual?" the sarcasm is practically rolling off of him in waves. The club with my friends.....so that's the excuse that Obi-Wan used when he couldn't find me and had to report to the council eh?

"Yeah....at the club...." I mutter a response.

"Come back soon Obi-Wan. Master Yoda wanted to speak with you."

"Alright" I answer.

"Good. See you soon Obi-Wan."

"Hm"

"Windu Out"

A click ends the transmission and I stow my comm link back to my belt. I then turn to my younger self "Where to for dinner then?" I ask flatly.

"Um see about that Obi-Wan....I um kind of wanted to go out to dinner at a place around here..." he pauses and looks away from me "with a friend."

My brows furrow slightly. And then I look down. This is so typical of me. To be such a let down at the last minute. And just to go out with a 'friend' a.k.a Padme. I guess there's nothing to do but head home now...

That how Obi-Wan felt? Let down? No he was probably crestfallen. He always was when I did things like this.

"We can go for dinner tomorrow, I promise!" the younger me says quickly, seeing my expression fall "I just really need to go with this friend tonight."

"I see.....speeder's at the east parking lot?" I mutter looking up.

"Yeah..." younger me says handing me the keys.

I take the ever so familiar keys into my hand and look at them for a while "See you soon then..." I say quietly before leaving him behind and jogging over to the east parking lot.

After wandering through the enormous lot for about a half an hour, I finally manage to find my yellow speeder all the way on the other side of the lot. Just my luck.

Suddenly out of no where something wet lands on my cheek. I look up, and more wetness lands onto my face. And then along with the heartstoppingly loud roar of thunder, it begins...to pour.

Just downright pour. For a moment I allow the rain to just soak me. Close my eyes and let it soak into my clothes, my hair, wash away all thats on my mind. It brings me to peace. At ease. All my worries and problems disappear...

That is until the second round of thunder sounds, jerking me out of my peaceful state of mind. Reminding me I have a life to live and problems to face.

I sigh and climb into my speeder. I flop down into the driver's seat and just sit there. The energy to start up the speeder and drive home seems to have left me.....

I close my eyes and unwind for a minute. Think things over. Think life over. Think everything over.

_Obi-Wan Kenobi. _

_Crazy man this one. Force I hate him. I hate him for having such a crappy life. Actually I hate myself for being so stubborn that it takes me this much to get to know him right. He's done so much for me. He's gone out of his way just for me so many times. And every time I overlooked it. He loved me and I overlooked it. He gave up everything for me and I overlooked it. _

_Force, I love him._

And with that thought I allow myself to drift into a light sleep.

**Phew....man that took me a while to get out XD well this might be the second or third to last chapter, I'm still debating on whether there shud be an epilouge or not.**

** So yeah, please please review!!! **


	10. All I'll Ever Need

**Hey guys, sorry it took a while, but here you go. The last chapter =] Enjoy!**

The first thing I see when I slowly open my eyes is....gravel?

My mind soon registers that I'm on my hands and knees, my head bowed to my chest...on....gravel. That could only mean....I'm....I'm back on Mustafar?

"Anakin!" I hear a more than familiar voice call.

My head immediately snaps up at the sound if it and I see....Obi-Wan. Obi-Wan, attempting to make his way up the small hill of gravel, away from the lava at his feet.

"Anakin! Are you-" But I don't hear the rest of what he says. The only thing that runs through my head at the sight of him is _oh shit, he's about to be engulfed by lava._ And with that single thought I scramble up and run over to the edge of the little hill. I slow myself down there and crouch down. I then reach down and grab a hold of his upper left arm and bring my other arm to grab his left forearm. And then with a swift strong movement, I pull him up onto solid (well as solid as the gravel underneath my feet get) ground.

As soon as he's safely on the ground next to me, I allow myself to fall back, panting heavily. The heat and dryness of the lava circulating around me, clouding my senses for a moment. I can hear him trying to catch his breath as well next to me.

I turn my head to look at him and see his head bowed to his chest, his breathing heavy, and sweat dripping down his face. He eventually realizes I'm staring at him and looks up to meet my gaze. His stormy grey eyes pierce through me. And suddenly...I see something I've never seen before in those eyes. I see everything I've lived through for the past force knows how long. All in those hurt, lonely, confused eyes.

And before my mind gets to think the action through, I wrap my arms around him and pull him into a hug. Something I haven't done since-......something I've never done. Force, just another thing to add to the list of "things Anakin has never done for his master." Along with overlooked everything he's done, never appreciated anything from him, always seen the fault in him. Force, I'm such a terrible person....

I bury my face into his shoulder in a futile attempt to suppress tears.

With that little notion, I feel Obi-Wan's confusion turn into sympathy and his arms come up around my back and pull me closer. "It's alright Anakin, I'm here....it's alright..." he whispers into my ear.

The soft words push me over the edge and the tears flood my eyes. I tighten my grip around his torso and screw my eyes shut. Letting my tears fall safely onto his shoulder. A shoulder that's always been there for me to cry on.

He holds me for a long time. Even after the tears have stopped falling, he just holds me. And it feels good. It feels safe.

"So why the sudden change of heart, Ani?" He says quietly after a while.

"I understand now...I'm sorry..." I whisper weakly. I can tell he probably has no idea what my words have to do with anything, but it's ok. Like he said. It's alright. He's here now "I won't ever let you down again master. I promise. I'm sorry..."

"Oh, Anakin..." He adjusts himself to rest his chin on top of my head "You never let me down. You never have, and I have full confidence you never will."

A comfortable silence comes over us as Obi-Wan continues to just hold me. Force do I love that feeling. The feeling of his secure grip just kind of chases away all of the galaxy's problems. It makes all the memory of the past few days go away for a moment. That moment that he holds me.

"You do know that Sidious is going to find us here eventually?" Obi-Wan pulls away far enough to meet my gaze with a sly smile.

A smile finds its way onto my face at his tone of voice. It's good to have things back to normal.

"Yeah I know" I smirk pulling away from him. I slowly stand up and brush off my clothes a bit before reaching a hand down for Obi-Wan. He just stares up at me for a bit before taking the hand and pulling himself up. He brushes off his burnt and abused clothes off as well before looking up at me. Perhaps waiting for me to finish this once and for all.

"And we'll take him on" I continue "You and me. We can do this....together."

His smile turns into a grin. That grin that he always gave me when I did a kata perfectly right after he showed it to me, or when I made a playful joke that he actually enjoyed. The one that started at his lips and made their way all the way up to his eyes. The one that made even the grayest shade of his eyes, shine. The one that I haven't seen in years.

And with the grin still on his face Obi-Wan brings his arms around me and this time _he_ is the one to pull me into the embrace. For a minute it shocks me, for Obi-Wan hasn't hugged me since I was 12. But then I realize, that maybe I wasn't the only one that was traumatized by all this.

"I'm so proud of you, Anakin" I hear a whisper in my ear. I smile and bring my arms up to return the embrace. Obi-Wan was right. Sidious would show up in no time. But it didn't matter. The strongest ally is on my side. Obi-Wan is on my side. The very same Obi-Wan who had gone through so much crap for me. So much pain, hurt and shame to become the man he is today. The very same Obi-Wan is with me.

My father is with me.

...And that's all I'll ever need.

**Well guys, there you go...the last chapter =] **

**I really don't like it much and I feel it came out terrible with too much mush but thats not for me to decide is it? =] I really really hope you enjoyed it and keep your heads up for the epilouge ok? **

**Reviews are so greatly appreciated words can't describe it =]  
**


	11. Epilouge

**Well, wat'd I tell ya? Up in 2 days =] Here it is guys, the epilogue (I still have no idea if I'm spelling that right or not XD) It takes place around 4 years after the last chapter, but I'm sure you can tell that after reading =] Enjoy!**

"Luke! For the love of the force give that back!" the voice of Anakin Skywalker came from the front yard.

Obi-Wan rolled his eyes as he palmed open the small decorative fence bordering the yard, only to meet an extremely amusing sight.

Anakin, chasing his young son around the entire yard shouting at the 4 year old to return his lightsaber. Meanwhile in the shade of the porch stood Padme, carrying her daughter, enjoying the sight as well.

"I leave you two alone for 20 minutes to go park the speeder and this is what I come back to?" Obi-Wan laughed walking in.

He surveyed the exterior of the small rural house. It was the house that Padme had bought on the other side of Coroscant for herself soon after he and Anakin has brought an end to the sith and Master Yoda announced Anakin would be allowed to stay in the order. Master Yoda had also been willing to take Anakin's twins into the order as well, Luke and Leia. Both Obi-Wan and Anakin had agreed that Luke was especially strong in the force and needed to be officially trained. And even Padme had agreed to that. The only problem was that she didn't really want to let little Leia go. After all with Anakin, Luke and Leia at the temple she would have no one left with her. Eventually though she had allowed both her children and Yoda had promised to let them out on visits. And besides Padme had family and friends around these parts that kept her company anyway.

All was well....besides the fact that the chosen one's lightsaber was in the possession of his 4 year old son of course....

"It's not my fault that-" Anakin broke off as he lunged at Luke. But ended up on the ground as Luke quickly sidestepped him and ran off. Obi-Wan's laughter increased as Anakin rolled onto his back on the grass muttering something about "never should have brought him to the temple to train his skills."

"I believe it is your fault Anakin" Obi-Wan chuckled.

"Force, no it's not. That little son of a-"

"Anakin!" Obi-Wan cut his former apprentice off "You know what? That's the problem here. Little son of an Anakin."

Anakin glared at his friend "Very funny, Obi-Wan."

"Master!" a small squeak cam from Luke as he dashed towards Obi-Wan and jumped into the older man's arms.

"Luke, let him sit down and rest a bit before you pounce him down, will you?" Padme called.

Obi-Wan looked up at his long time friend "Hello Padme, how are you?"

"Good I guess now that you four have decided to stop by" Padme smiled as she stepped off the porch and walked towards Obi-Wan. Once in front of him they reached over fro a small friendly hug and a kiss on the cheek.

She gave him a warm smile and returned to her spot on the porch "Anakin get off the grass, you're ruining my yard!" she teased.

"Oh sure, no 'are you alright Ani?' or 'Luke give your father back his dangerous weapon immediately!' no none of that! This woman's all 'get off my yard you're ruining it!" Anakin grumbled pulling himself off the ground.

"Speaking of, what's that you've got there padawan?" Obi-Wan asked smiling at the boy in his arms.

"Daddy's lightsaber!!" Luke yelled holding it up for Obi-Wan to see.

"Oh, I see. Daddy always did have a terrible habit of loosing his lightsaber in every situation possible" Obi-Wan glanced up to see Anakin's much expected reaction to that comment, and then returned his attention to Luke "Can I see it?"

Luke nodded furiously and handed the saber to his master.

"Good boy" Obi-Wan smiled, taking the weapon. He eyed it and felt it in his hand for a moment before tossing it over to Anakin, who caught it and returned it to his belt. Making sure it was safely hooked on this time.

"I will never know how you manage do that" he muttered, brushing his clothes off.

"Just as I will never know how you manage to get your lightsaber stolen by a four year old" Obi-Wan smirked.

"Yeah yeah whatever" Anakin muttered as he too made his way and stepped into the shade of the porch "I'm gonna go inside and grab some lemonade or something from inside." And with that Anakin disappeared inside the house.

"You'd better follow him" Padme advised.

Obi-Wan just raised a brow.

"Just to makes sure the kitchen is one piece when he comes back."

Obi-Wan smiled and did as he was told, releasing his padawan onto the porch on his way in.

Upon entering the house, the first thing that caught Obi-Wan's attention was the cleanliness of the place. Everything was so neat and in order. Unlike his and Luke's quarters back at the temple. Less said about that the better....

Obi-Wan rid himself of that thought and made his way to the kitchen where he leaned against the door frame and watched his former apprentice dig through the refrigerator looking for the force knew what. It was quite a funny sight actually. Anakin with his face buried inside the fridge. Obi-Wan almost laughed.

"Are you going to stand there quietly all day like some kind of Jedi Pedophile or are you going to help me find something to make lemonade with?" Anakin grumbled from inside the fridge.

"What are you looking for anyway?" Obi-Wan asked.

"Oh, never mind, found it. Thanks for the help though" Anakin smirked pulling out a few lemons and closing the refrigerator door with his foot. He then turned to the kitchen counter and pulled out an old hand juicer from underneath it.

"You're going to make it manually?" Obi-Wan raised a brow "Who are you and what have you done with Anakin?"

"I am actually Obi-Wan Kenobi from the future and I have come back and taken on the form of Anakin Skywalker to blend in" Anakin laughed as he began to juice his first lemon. Obi-Wan laughed as well. And soon their laughter died into a comfortable silence.

Obi-Wan took this time to look at his former apprentice. Actually look at him. Look at how much he's grown since Mustafar. Since he turned away from the dark side. He still didn't understand what exxactly had made Anakin change his mind that day. One second he was out for cold bloody murder and the next second he was crying into Obi-Wan's chest. Of course all thoughts of what changed Anakin's mind left Obi-Wan when Sidious showed up. Then it was all efforts into bringing the sith down. Force, it's been so long since then.

"Can you believe it's been 4 years?" Anakin said suddenly, bringing Obi-Wan back to reality.

"Hm? No...not really" Obi-Wan answered. He vaguely wondered if Anakin had just read his thoughts or just brought up the topic at random.

"So much has changed hasn't it?" Anakin looked up for a moment a and returned to his lemon juicing.

"All for the better" Obi-Wan muttered "You never did tell me why you saved me that day..."

"No Obi-Wan...._you _saved me" Anakin didn't have to look at his former master tell the older man was raising a brow "After I struck you down...I sort of took the time to...look at things...through your eyes..."

"Well I'm glad you did" Obi-Wan smiled. He took a deep breath and took a step closer to his former padawan "Anakin, when Qui-Gon chose me to be his apprentice I was overjoyed. Ecstatic, happy, just everything positive beyond belief. It was the happiest I had ever felt. I swore I knew the meaning of true happiness. And when Qui-Gon died I was in pain. I was in utter, agonizing pain. I mean even you saw it. Drinking every night, making a complete mess of myself. I thought that one could never feel pain greater than what I was feeling at that moment. And then 20 years later when Mustafar happened" Obi-Wan paused to look up at Anakin. His former padawan was looking anywhere but at him...he continued anyway "And it was only when Mustafar happened did I realize that it was possible for one to feel more pain than what I felt when Qui-Gon died. I realized it was possible to feel that pain a thousand fold. I swear on the force Anakin, there was nothing more painful in this life than when you see that little boy you raised impale you in the chest with that same style that you taught him....and when you look up praying to see regret in his eyes, all you see is cold pleasure. There is _nothing_ more painful than that Anakin..." Obi-Wan cut himself off and took a deep breath. He looked up and saw Anakin wasn't even juicing anymore. He just stood there, hands griping either side of the counter till his knuckled where white. Head bowed to his chest. And silent tears threatening him.

"And then...stars end, you fell over on your hands and knees and got this real funny look on your face...and then you looked at me and freaked...out" Obi-Wan chuckled. Even Anakin had to laugh a little at that. "I mean here I am screaming 'Anakin are you alright?!' off the top of my lungs and then this one scrambles over to me faster than he runs when I tell him he can go out to the junkyard to pick out spare parts. And just pulls me away from the hands of death, and starts crying into my shoulder..." At this point Anakin wasn't so sure if he was supposed to be laughing or crying, so he was doing a bit of both.

"It was then that I realized, it was possible for one to be happier than I was when Qui-Gon chose me to be his apprentice..." Obi-Wan concluded in a whisper. Anakin looked up at his former master for the first time in a while.

And as if they had read each others mind, wrapped one another in a tight embrace.

"Force, I should have done this 4 years ago. It is far too late to be having this conversation...." Obi-Wan murmured into Anakin's hair.

"It's never too late to understand" Anakin whispered.

"Hm?" Obi-Wan raised a brow, pulling back enough to be able to see his former padawan's eyes.

"Nothing" Anakin chuckled and settled into to enjoying the hug once more. Obi-Wan allowed him to do so...that is until Anakin felt a tug at his pants.

The two Jedi masters quickly parted and looked down, only to see young Luke at Anakin's feet.

"What's wrong Luke?" Anakin asked staring into his son's pout.

"I wanna hug Daddy!" Luke cried.

Obi-Wan and Anakin both laughed.

"Alright come here kiddo" Anakin smiled crouching down to his son's height. He put his arms around the boy's back and held him in a protective embrace "So I take it this means peace between us?"

"Nope" Luke grinned as he squirmed out of his father's hug, snatched the lightsaber from his belt, and dashed out of sight.

While Obi-Wan alughed, Anakin just dropped to the ground, jaw hanging slightly open "That little...son..."

"Son of an Anakin" Obi-Wan sighed, and laughed as Anakin stared up at him "Fine fine, I'll go get him." And with that Obi-Wan walked off in the same direction Luke had.

Anakin laughed as he heard a call of "Padawan...out that down or Daddy is not going to be happy if-no don't touch that here either! Come here you little squirt!" coming from the depths of the house, followed by the furious giggling of a certain blond little 4 year old. He sighed he vaguely wondered how much longer it would take him to repair the damage Luke sounded like he was doing to the house. Force that kid really knew how to wreak havoc, and the only one who could ever stop him was Obi-Wan. But then again the only one who could ever stop Anakin from doing something stupid is Obi-Wan as well. It was like Obi-Wan was some sort of kind angel given to the Skywalker family from the force. Because there was no way any human could do half the things Obi-Wan does. Anakin really didn't understand things like that sometimes....

But like he said...it's never too late...To Understand.

**Well guys, that was it =] I really hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it and it makes me so sad to end it. God...really it's just been so fun reading all your reviews and writing all this up. Man I'm gonna miss it XD Oh and there's this short song-fic I wrote the other day that I posted yesterday called "Always Know Where You Are" and I was reading it over and I found that it would make a great companion piece to this, so if you wanna go check that out then feel free to =]**

**But I was really hoping that you guys will stick around for a new short story that I was going to start that's somewhat simmilar to this. Just something random that came to me the other day, I'll give you a brief summary as to what it's about and you decide if you wanna see it or not =] So here goes:**

**14 year old Obi-Wan Kenobi has been Qui-Gon Jinn's apprentice for 2 years. And for 2 yars Obi-Wan has tolerated being pushed around and blamed for things that aren't his fault. For 2 years he's tolerated Qui-Gon, but now he's done. He's packed his bags and he's running away. But just when he's about to close his suitcase and head out, a large flash behind him catches hia attention. And upon turning around, Obi-Wan sees...and older version of himself standing before him. Not too old, not too young, the man looked like he was in his early 30's.  
**

**This older Obi-Wan goes through a bit of questioning before the younger Obi-Wan believes anything he says. And when they finally sit down older Obi-Wan, or better known in his time as Ben, explains the future he's come from and the past he's trying to save. **

**"Judging by that suitcase I caught you at the right time"**

**"Why are you here anyway?"**

**"Because running away was the biggest mistake I ever made. And I'm not letting myself make it again."**

**What do you think? Good? I hope so, I'll be uploading that story very soon =] Also for any of you who are a fan of Xanatos, I'd really recommend my story "If Everyone Cared" and it's sequel "Someday to you guys =] Ok now, before I start sounding conceited, thank you so much for staying with me through this and thank you for all your reviews, they are appreciated so much I can't even describe it through words.**

** And please please review for me, one last time =]  
**


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